The ones who suffer are the ones that are left behind

by - July 07, 2011

I never felt so much in a day before. Yesterday somebody, not sure whether it is an accident or not, jumped. I'm like searching for words to use to write this post. It is hard. Hard to express what I want to say. A mixture of emotions. No, turmoil, a state of blank.


She is not someone I know but I'm super lost and sad at that moment. Well, she fell right next to my house and I have a clear view of everything.


Life, so fragile. 




I did not witness the whole process of... death. I'm thankful I didn't. Couldn't sleep last night and mind was all messed up just by looking at the aftermath. I would certainly go bonkers if I did.
Thank god, literally.


So this was what happened. I napped like 3 times yesterday. So mad tired and I'm aching so badly because of that irritating monthly cycle. Imagine I didn't sleep, I would have heard the bangs, the screams, the commotions. Me being myself, I would definitely check it out.

And that will be the worst choice of my life.
I know, I always watch people killing one another, eating each other blahblahblah on tv but when it comes to real life situations, I don't think I'm fit to handle it.




Thank you all the aches and sores.



Anyhow, I only realised this whole thing when I'm keeping the laundry at 7pm. Was shocked when I see a policeman downstairs with a tent.

Called sm but she didn't pick up. Her phone >.<. I'm so lost, seriously lost. Called mum and only managed to calm down when sister reached home.

And she's pretty indifferent about it.


A lot of people are.
But I ain't. 



I know, who don't die? In fact, people die every single day for every other reason. But I never thought it'd be so near to me. So near. It's like watching a movie in 3d. Yet, it is not something you can brush off after the whole 'show' ended.




I cannot imagine what I'd do if someone close passed away. I can't. Plain crazy.



I'm not afraid or anything because I've nothing to do with this whole thing.
I'm just affected. Traumatised. Shocked. And perhaps, depressed as well.
I can't help to wonder how her family is going to handle this. Pray everything will be better though words can't change the fact forever.


I hate to say this but this is part and parcel of life.
Now I only hope my family, friends and love ones stay with me, till death do us apart.



From now on, I would want to create more happy memories, for myself and for others. Because in life, you will never know what happen next.


You too,  okay?

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