I hope I can turn back time, to the time when I'm holding you, so tight.
Then I would tell you everything I felt. I will no longer be a bad girl.
No longer flare up for no good reason.
No longer blame you for everything bad that happens, like the weather ._.

I will cherish every second like there's no the other.
I will never let my hands leave, I'll never let you go.
I will never push you away, I'll lean on you throughout the movie.
I will look forward to every single date, even it's going to buy some groceries.
I'll not complain and whine about life, instead I'll thank god for everything he gives.



Now, heaven is punishing me. They seems to shout "YOU DESERVE IT!"




Let you go? NO, perhaps, YES.
Heart and mind, make up a decision.
Because I'm hurting you now, I don't like this.
I want the best for you, I want you to be happy even if it takes me great efforts and pain..
BUT, who will make me happy? who will consider my feelings?
Who wldn't abandon me alone?
who will stop the heartache and tears?



Somehow, I keep lying to myself, saying everything is okay, you just need time.
Yes I'll give you time.
But what if? Why do I want to subject myself to such horrendous pain? Love is blind. Love makes even genius stupid.




I wish I've amnesia, then I would be able to forget everything and all the pain.
But I dont want to.. I don't want to forget everything we shared. I rather bear the pain.


I pray to god, deities, flowers, tai shan.. blahblahblah. every single thing.
Hoping they will just stop this and return you back to me.


Pain sucks. Time sucks.



Please save me,
I don't feel like I'm living anymore.
This is faster than dying under Mdm chan's hands.